When the world premiere of a new version of Hedda Gabler takes the stage at the Coal Mine Theatre this weekend, it’s going to be a who’s who of Canadian arts royalty — not least of all director Moya O’Connell. The critically-acclaimed actor, director and theatre artist is bringing to life the Norwegian play’s new version created by actor and artist Liisa Repo-Martell. The show stars Diana Bentley, film, TV and theatre actor and co-founder of the Coal Mine Theatre, and the original music is created by Metric’s and Broken Social Scene’s Emily Haines — a longtime friend of O’Connell’s. Their connecting puzzle piece in the Canadian arts scene is Torquil Campbell — musician with indie rock band Stars and musical duo Memphis; actor; playwright; occasional Broken Social Scene performer; oh, and O’Connell’s husband. Moya O’Connell and Torquil Campbell share the details of their onstage meet-cute, unspoken proposal and annual New Year’s Day wedding.
How they met
Torquil: We met acting. My parents were directing a play in Vancouver, I was cast in it because of nepotism and Moya was cast in it because she was talented and beautiful. My mother predicted I would fall in love with her. I fell in love with her the moment I saw her.
The first date
Moya: We never dated. It went from 0-100. We were working together and I found Torquil both fascinating and entirely too opinionated. I do remember one lunch during our first few weeks when the entire acting company were together at a local greasy spoon restaurant and Torq was really having a bash about something. I had just graduated from theatre school. It was one of my first professional jobs and was surrounded by artists I revered and respected but something about his complete certainty about this particular topic of conversation undid me. I stood up in the middle of lunch and yelled at him in front of the entire cast — his mother and father and the director of the theatre and then proceeded to turn on my heel and slam the flimsy screen door of the restaurant. I think I swore at him, actually (I definitely did). As I sailed through that door knowing that I had sealed my fate and was about to be fired for the outburst, I heard Torq say, “Me thinks the lady doth protest too much.”  It was our meet-cute. Torquil can upset an equilibrium like no one I have ever met. It was that exact moment that I fell. It’s difficult to describe how electric Torq is. He can affect any situation. He is like weather.
The proposal
Moya: It didn’t involve language. I think it was just deeply known that this was IT. To be honest, it was like a force majeure. Titanic. Overwhelming. It was inevitable.
The wedding and honeymoon
Moya: We got married a year and a half after we met on the mountain in Montreal. We married ourselves and carved our names into a tree in -35 C on New Year’s Day. We get married every year since on New Year’s Day. Every year in a new way with new folks attending (or not). There have been some years we postponed due to uncertainty. Some years have been massive celebrations. It’s the very best ritual we have as a couple.
At one point we decided to make it legal and eloped to Nevis (in the Caribbean). It was extremely fun and very low key.
The kids
Torq: We have a kid named Ellington, and she is living up to her name.
Shared hobbies and interests
Torq: Baseball. Dogs, even though we don’t own one. 90s thrillers, especially ones with Denzel Washington in them. The air in our neighbourhood. The light on the trees. Watching our kid grow. Picnics. Cornhole. Jumping in any available bodies of water. Art, i guess.
The secret to success
Torq: We keep it ride or die. And we think each other are clever. And if you can’t stay in love with Moya, you are dead inside.
Moya: We talk. And talk and talk. We allow each other space to change. and give each other a lot of freedom. In our 24 years together there have been many different versions of us. And we love each other’s families.
Balancing careers and relationships
Torq: How does anyone? It’s a choice. I bet it’s a lot harder to balance your relationship if you do shift work and you only see your partner in the middle of the night. I bet it’s hard to balance your work and relationship when you have to care for a sick parent or kid. But I wouldn’t know, because I’m a lucky bastard whose only challenge is missing my wife when she’s gone away for work.
The future
Moya:Â Peaceful. Adventurous. Contemplative. Unorthodox. Hilarious. Drunken. Ecstatic. Boring.
