Toronto’s Sexapalooza opens this afternoon, promising a “safe yet titillating” adult consumer show. Curious about whether you should head to this show? We don’t blame you. Here’s what you need to know.
1. The location ain’t sexy
Unless you get turned on by the smell of jet fuel (and if you do, that’s fine, we don’t judge), Sexapalooza’s airport-adjacent location may not get you in the mood for love. It’s taking over Hall 6 of the International Centre next to Pearson, where it will be competing for customers with the Hot Tub and Swim Spa Blowout sale.
2. You can take your mom — its educational
In addition to seminars on such subjects as latex clothing and lap dancing, there’s also instructional videos on upgrading your skills in the sack from the Sinclair Institute. And the on-site museum will tell you more than you needed to know about the history of sex. An institute and a museum under one roof? It’s practically Harvard.
3. It’s an opportunity for flag waving
Among the performers on the main stage: the Canadian Hot Bods male strippers and the Great Canadian Burlesque performers. You can make your own “Oh Canada” jokes.
4. You can be beautiful too
Let’s face it, hanging around all that firm, naked flesh is going to make you a bit conscious of your flabby bits. Which is possibly why the Sexapalooza exhibitors list includes at least one plastic surgeon. We’re not sure how we feel about that.
5. Sports injuries are a possibility
Okay, we’ve all done it. You get a few ideas to spice things up at the sex show, try them out at home and pull a muscle in your leg. So maybe stop by the 3 Second Heat stand on your way out — they sell reusable heatpads to soothe the pain. They also claim their product is suitable for “outdoor activities.” By which they mean hiking, obviously.
Sexapalooza, Hall 6, International Centre, Feb. 24-26